Ever Notice How Many Choices You Make in a Day?
Life is a sequence of choices. One after another after another. When my alarm goes off, I have a choice: get out of bed or sleep another 15 minutes? Once up, do my side planks or skip them today? Next, downstairs in the kitchen, black tea or add cream? Kids’ lunches - what can I put together for the most nutrition and the least complaints? How much of the lunch is going to be from scratch, or not(!), today? And so on. Big choices. Small choices. All. Day. Long. Even when you’re on autopilot, you're making decisions, left, right and centre. After all, you set the cruise control and you choose when to turn it off. Even when it doesn’t feel like it. Yes, even your habits are yours. Add to this, all the decisions you're making for other people!
Decision Making Can Wear You Down And Make You Doubt
All that decision-making can wear you out. Every choice you make leaves room for self doubt and the underlying stress that goes with that. How often are we left second guessing ourselves?
It's especially easy to feel unsure where we’re not getting the results we want from our choices. That's an outcome worth avoiding - because we doubt all over again. That’s not what I want for you, or for me.
Nothing is ever 100%. However, that said, I want want to feel confident I'm doing the right thing. And still be flexible enough to change my course. Years ago, way back in 1991, a friend wrote a poem to me, and this was one of the lines: "...with her long braid, her deep devouring belief in values. She was unwilling to budge in her opinions, yet a sense of 'finding herself' was never too far away when she spoke". While I don't want to be seen as overly stubborn, (I guess I am), what this pointed to was that I was already pursuing a life of slow living. Accompanied by inner confusion, I was also attempting to figure out the place for beauty in all of that.
(Thanks, Jane Jordan, for writing this poem to me. The most beautiful and loving going-away gift I've ever received).
Slow Living Led To The Right Questions
By now, I have enough experience to believe I have something worthwhile to share about not only slow living, but also its offshoot, Slow Beauty. And a great deal of this expertise exists because I’m still trying to find my way, every day.
I'd love to share with you how I go about asking myself the right questions. In hopes you'll get something from this, too.
For years, the only makeup I’ve worn is eyeliner and mascara. Lately, I’ve taken to leaving off the eyeliner. The eyeliner on my counter doesn’t pass my slow beauty test. Everything else I put on my skin passes with flying colors! My eyeliner? No. It doesn't! I can't feel good about it. Put it to my test and you'll see all the ways in which this big-business stick can't possibly meet the bar.
What's the slow beauty test? It's a conscious decision making process crafted to result in a healthy choice. Including the healthy relief that comes from doing away with the weight of indecision. When I’m true to the process, I feel great. I can bask in the moment. Being and doing. No more back and forth thinking required that's sucking up my happiness.
Here are the questions I ask myself when I'm making (slow) beauty product decisions. Please, let me know how these questions from the slow beauty guide to better decision making work out for you!
Slow Beauty Guide to Better Decision Making
1) Does this product and its brand inspire me? Does it lift my spirit? Does this company align with my values? Am I excited to support this company or creator’s vision? Do I want to go along on their journey, too?
2) What do I think of the packaging? Is it a yes or a no? Is it pretty? Will I feel uplifted when I see this on my counter?
What’s the carbon footprint like? Can I reuse or recycle - or maybe even compost - the packaging? Does the packaging and design express a sense of integrity? Or does it make me feel like this company’s out only for my dollar?
3) Is this product going to harm or help my physical health? Is it pure? Does it contain questionable ingredients? Am I willing to make the trade-offs, if there are any? What are the risks versus benefits? Long term versus short term: am I potentially sacrificing my long term health and beauty so that I can look good or save a few dollars today?
4) How does this product feel when I put it on? Do I want to go around all day, or all night, feeling this way?
If the product has made it this far, it’s successfully jumped through the hoops. Amazing!
Spiritually fantastic fit: Check ✅ Ethically, it's all good: Check ✅ Physically, it's not doing me any harm: Check ✅ Healing? Yes: Check ✅ Yay! I'm going to be real with you. All those check marks aren't enough. Ultimately, this is a beauty product. It’s supposed to make me look good, too! So, here are the last and equally important questions: 5) Do I love the way this product makes me look? Is it making improvements to my reflection in the mirror? Is it making me the most beautiful version of me, the way I want to be seen?
I need to say yes to all of the above. Otherwise, it’s a no-go for me. This goes for every product I put on my skin or hair, every tiny step of the way. If you have a question or two to add to this list, I'd love to hear them.
When you see me in eyeliner again, you’ll know I’ve found something new! A product I've approved with my slow beauty philosophy ✅
After reading this post, after giving more thought to your own process of choosing beauty products, what have you decided it's time to swap out? What are you going to trade in so you, too, can stop second guessing that you're using what's good for you? If you need any more resources for choosing more products, please drop a line below in the comments or send me a message. I'd love to help. My best to you, Chwynyn
PS the slow beauty decision making process has a way of spreading its tentacles into every facet of your life. Which I personally think is absolutely fantastic!
